True to myself, changing about page to be more ‘me’

Don’t lose who you are, in the blur of the stars
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing
It’s okay not to be okay
Sometimes it’s hard, to follow your heart
Tears don’t mean you’re losing, everybody’s bruising
Just be true to who you are
Lyrics from Who You Are by Jessie J

I am a big believer of always being true to who you are, true to yourself, as that is the only honest way to be. Never change yourself for someone else. Sadly, I have been there too many times, and all those relationships, whether romantic ones or friendships, have ended in disaster, the most recent ones being in 2020.

I am who I am

So many times in my life I changed part of myself to be what I thought the person I was with wanted me to be. As I grew older, I have sworn not to do it ever again (I did it in two marriages, and also other romantic relationships), but sometimes it still happened without me noticing or understanding that it’s happening. Hindsight is a great thing, and many times only after disaster struck — divorce, broken friendship — I recognized that I had fallen in the same trap again. Thankfully, it doesn’t happen that much anymore, as I am much more confident in who I am than I have been for the greater part of my life. My Facebook tagline actually says “I am who I am”.

There are two people with whom I have always been just me, always been my true self, and those are Master T and my best friend. Never ever did I have to pretend to be anyone else, or have I tried to change my ways because I subconsciously thought they might ‘like me better’. Sadly, I have done that with other people, because I wanted to fit in, I wanted to belong. It was only when I realized some of my core values — kindness, respect, love — were trampled on, and I distanced myself, that I realized I had done it yet again.

I know I can say ‘never again’, but I also know that it can happen again. However, the events of 2020 have increased my awareness of this, and I hope it doesn’t happen again, as I need to always be true to myself, to always live to my own words, “I am who I am” and to hold onto those things I find important: treat people with kindness, respect them for who they are, and spread love, not hate.

About me and being true to myself

Now you would’ve thought that the above paragraphs were already about me, but don’t fear, I am not going to repeat anything! No, this is about the about page on this website. For Blogable, I wrote the article What should you share on your about page? and as I did, I realized my own about page was totally out of date.

The last time I had updated it was June 2019, and as I read through don’t ‘t want to share anymore, and people and projects I don’t want to promote anymore. At first I have thought to leave my old about page intact, and then share a link to it in my new one, but like I said, I just don’t want to link to things I can’t back anymore.

Changing my about page, removing those links, meant I am moving back to being true to myself, to take back control of who I am, and not walk in line with what others expect of me. I know I am not a bad person, regardless of what some people might think, and I know I respect everyone for who they are, what they believe, how they identify, and how they live their lives. I hope my new about page reflects a bit of that, but by reading my words on this website, you see the person I am.

Renewing more than only the about page

I find myself at a point where I want to renew more than only my about page, and have already started looking at themes to update my site. I actually love the theme I have now, but I feel like I need something different. Something… more me. I have already started browsing themes, and trying some of them out on my test subdomain, but haven’t made my final decision yet. I might just stick with what I have… time will tell…

© Rebel’s Notes

4 Thoughts or Fiction

13 thoughts on “True to myself, changing about page to be more ‘me’

  1. When I was growing up Popeye’s “I am who I am and that’s all that I am” was my motto until I hit my 20’s and I lost it. Who I am like your page seems to be an ongoing work in progress. Thanks for sharing it is good to know that we all have to strip away the faces we add to please. Pleasing others has a cost. Making sure that the acts to please fit with our authentic self is critical.

    1. Oh yes, you are so right: pleasing others has a cost. Love that last sentence! So true!

  2. Marie
    I love your new about me page! I should revamp my own I think. And if I do, it will be because of your inspiration! This post contains wisdom. We should always be true to ourselves. But I know how external forces and situations will sometimes cause us to “change” in order to fit in. Sometimes we just need to walk away to stay true to who we are. My Queen knows me—all my good and all my bad. She accepts me for being me and I can tell her anything. While I have other close friends, she is likely the only one who knows “all”. My male friends would have great difficulty with my submission and particularly with my cage. So would many of my female friends. But I’d dearly love to have a few friends I could share this with.

    1. Michael, you are so right… “Sometimes we just need to walk away to stay true to who we are.”
      Like your Queen knows you, Master T knows me, every aspect of me, and he accepts me the way I do him. And yes, I get that you would like to have friends to share your submission and your cage with. It’s good to be able to share, but not always possible. I look forward to seeing your new about page, when you get around to doing it 🙂

  3. I think 2020 has brought periods of reflection and taking stock of like to many of us. I feel the same when I think about relationships and projects I was part of online and so can understand the need to pull away and refine who you are. I am not sure what to do with my own about page but am hoping for some inspiration from others. ❤️

    1. I am sure once you sit down to change your about page, you will come up with something, and it will be as beautiful as you are <3

  4. I completely … COMPLETELY … agree Marie.
    We should always be true to ourselves and be just who we want to be.
    I think we all fall into those traps of trying to be whom others want us to be … but as we “mature” it becomes easier to acknowledge that the best parts of who we have become are the things that are most important and true to ourselves.
    And the important people in our lives, loved ones … and true friends … are in our lives because they have accepted us for whom we really are. And we have accepted them for whom they really are.
    And that will always be the most important, most fulfilling, factor in any relationship.
    Celebrate … and enjoy … and really live the “real me”.
    Xxx – K
    P.s. – That’s a very impressive new collar … and in my (our ???) favourite colour !!!!

    1. You write such true words, K, and you understand exactly how I feel. Those who know, and who have cared to get to know me better, they accept me for who I am, as I accept them for who they are. We don’t all have to be the same, but we can at least treat each other with respect, even when we don’t have the same opinions on everything, or do things the same way. And yes, I think we both have the same favorite color 😉 xox

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: