X- words are so difficult, right?
I am the last person who will say that I think we have an extraordinary relationship, or that we are extraordinary people. I am far too humble for that, and if anyone would say that to me, I will definitely downplay it, saying ‘I am just me’ as I don’t like to stand out, and don’t like to think of myself as special. I really am just me, doing my thing, being kind, understanding, loving and always trying to learn more about the world around me. And, where I definitely think that Master T is an extraordinary person, essentially he is simply who he is: also a kind, understanding and loving person.
But, together we’ve had quite some extraordinary moments, remarkable moments that stand out like beacons in our relationship.
The very first one that comes to mind is how we met. How a simple sentence he sent me as a ‘supplier’ peaked my curiosity, and before we know we had sent each other 300 one-liner emails during the course of an evening. Yes, seriously, 300 emails! That night, every email I got and every email I sent was read to my mom and kids (we lived together back then), but the next day the emails between Master T and me turned more intimate, so I kept much of it to myself.
Many other moments followed — the day we met face to face for the first time, our secret meetings in one of the ‘bushy’ parts of the town we now live in, the day we finally told everyone we were in a relationship, and how our children accepted us and each other. Then there’s the day I moved in with Master T, and the day we got married. And what do you think of the day we became grandparents, or the day we witnessed our oldest getting married? Those were some pretty special days we had together too.
If I think of our sex life, there were many special moments between the two of us, but also brilliant times we have spent with others. Never had I thought a sex life can be as rewarding as the one I have with Master T, and yes, even now that it’s at a low, I am still grateful for what we have. I know he still wants me, and just the thought of that makes this low we are going through okay. Also, part of me not worrying about the little sex we had is that my own desire seems to be down.
This is something I had expressed to Master T, how I feel that it’s not only him, but also me. He’s very rational about it: don’t force it, it will come back. And you know what? I believe it will. We are honest about our true feelings, and he knows I miss the sex, as much as I know that he misses it too. However, I think it will do more damage if we ‘force’ ourselves to have sex without really feeling we want to. We can much rather express our true feelings about it, and enjoy being together in other ways, like hugging or kissing, or just sitting together somewhere on a terrace, a drink in hand and enjoying the fresh air and sunshine.
Expressing our true feelings to each other, makes for more extraordinary moments, don’t you think?
© Rebel’s Notes