Movies & Me

Confession: I am terrible at remembering movies, especially their names, or the names of the actors. Sometimes I do remember scenes, but then I can’t remember which movie it came from.

That said, of course I have watched a lot of movies in my life. Back in my younger years and still living with my parents, they were the ones who decided what we would watch, and to be really honest, absolutely nothing comes to mind. Except: Blue Lagoon. The reason this movie came to mind, and also the reason why I remember the name, is because this is one we were not allowed to see, and I think the movie might have already been 10 years old when I saw it for the first time. By then I had seen more movies with naked scenes in them, and they always intrigued me. I always wanted to see more. Wanted them to show more. I am an exhibitionist by nature, but the exhibitionist feelings were there before I saw any movies with naked scenes in them.

I think the same goes for other movies I have seen and where I felt a connection with, such as Secretary and Story of O. I only saw those movies long after I have understood that I am submissive by nature. Both these movies only confirmed what I already knew, and when there are scenes in other movies where the man exerts control over the woman, especially when it’s subtle, but firm, it gets me wet every time. James Spader (I’m instantly wet when I see him) also played in Boston Legal and there were subtle references towards the role he played in Secretary. I loved those scenes, especially since they were so subtle.

Another powerful scene from a movie that I really liked, was the scene where Sharon Stone uncrossed and spread her legs during an interview. Hot damn, that was just… unfff! I know there are people out there who might not share my enthusiasm for this scene, but this taps in with my exhibitionism, and maybe also because of the control she had of the situation. Coming to think of it: I was about fourteen or fifteen when I flashed my crotch at our neighbour boy, at his request. Once again the movie followed after I have done something similar, be it in a different setting. This might be why this scene appeals to me so much.

Do you have a scene (or scenes) from a movie/TV show would you love to reenact?

A scene from the movie Secretary with James Spader and Maggie GyllenhaalThere might be so many scenes I can mention here, but because of my bad memory regarding movies, I can’t name anything else than what I have already mentioned above. One scene I would love to reenact is the one from secretary, where James Spader stands behind Maggie Gyllenhaal. She’s leaning on his desk, and he spanks her from behind. That scene is just so fucking sexy, and where I am not into role play, this is a scene I would like to play out, at the direction of the spanker. Even better if the spanker could be James Spader himself, but of course that’s never going to happen.

Can you credit any movie/TV show for the origination of any of your kinks/sexual interests?

As mentioned above, the movies that stand out for me, all happened after I have already done something or already learned something about myself. Still, this doesn’t mean that there were no movies that have been the origin of some of my kinks or sexual interests. It’s just that I can’t remember them.


I don’t watch a lot of movies, as I am mainly writing in the evenings while Master T looks for movies he wants to see. Sometimes those are older movies, sometimes newer ones. Occasionally there are movies I want to watch with him, and then he waits for me to sit on the couch, and we watch together. There are times that we watch a movie together, and then later I read about others who have seen the same movie, and were outraged at some scenes. Most of the time I haven’t noticed what they had, and it makes me feel uncomfortable and inadequate that I haven’t been outraged too. It makes me feel like I am not as sex-positive as I think I am. The thing is that when I sit down to watch a movie, I want to relax, which means I take whatever I see at face value. I don’t look for things that might be seen as misogyny or feel enraged when a movie is not inclusive of all groups. Thankfully, sometimes I do feel the irritation at some scenes, but sadly, I miss most of them.

If you have any scenes from movies you can direct me to, which would feed either my exhibitionism or submissive side, please let me know!

© Rebel’s Notes

Food for Thought Friday

3 thoughts on “Movies & Me

  1. I struggle with watching movies on TV or my laptop. I don’t have the attention span anymore. But I do still love to watch them in the theater. I used to go every week the I lived in Thailand. I always think I “should” take that up again, but like you, I’d probably prefer to be writing than watching movies anymore.

  2. I would rather read or write than watch most movies but just occasionally i feel the need to zone out – then I watch a movie x

  3. Not seen Secretary, maybe should add it to our list of things to watch when we want a quiet night, even though it might turn sexy.

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