Swinging, sometimes called wife swapping, husband swapping or partner swapping, is sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in such activities with others as a recreational or social activity. Swinging is a form of non-monogamy and is an open relationship.
~ Wikipedia

I have never been a swinger. In all the relationships I have been in, I have always been in a relationship only with the one person. In my second marriage I did have one night where I fucked someone else, but since it was without my husband’s knowledge and consent that was adultery, and not swinging.

As many of you know, Master T and I have had quite a number of playdates with other people, but those were not on the basis of swinging, but just kinky dates where I got fucked by other men. During some of those playdates, Master T got sucked off by the other woman, but we still didn’t label that as swinging. The fucking was just part of the fun we were having with other people.

My understanding of swinging is indeed the swapping part, as mentioned in the quote above. The way I see it, four people are in one room and the partners swap around, so no one is fucking their own partner. However, reading the part ‘both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in such activities with others as a recreational or social activity’, I wonder if what we did couldn’t be labelled as swinging after all. I mean, I am a partner in a committed relationship, and I engage in sex with others while my husband is present, and I do it as a recreational/social activity. So strictly speaking, our playdates might not only have had a kinky element to it, but also an element of swinging.

There is something about swingers clubs that totally intrigue me. I have never been to one, but I imagine that it’s a place where everyone can have sex (consensual of course) with everyone. However, here’s the thing: it wouldn’t ever work if Master T and I to go to a swingers club, simply because Master T is not interested in fucking anyone else. He loves to watch when I am fucked by others. My thoughts continue: maybe if we ever end up in a swingers club, we should seek out single men that come there, and have them fuck me while Master T watches. This means it would tap into both our kinks: me being fucked by someone else because Master T wants it; him watching me being fucked/used by someone else.

Having said that, I know we will never get to a swingers club. I have this thing in me where I first need to get to know someone before I can allow them to fuck me. I don’t fuck with strangers. The only way a swingers club would be an option is when we get to know someone outside of the club, and then the three of us go there to fuck. But then again, why would we do that in a swingers club if we could also do that at home (not currently, but within the next month or two this will be possible).

To conclude: is what we do swinging or not?
I still lean to saying that it’s not, probably because I’ve had this image of swapping partners in my head for years. What we do is kinky fucking, where both Master T and I get what we want.

No swinging for us, unless of course when it’s a sex swing!

© Rebel’s Notes
Image from Pixabay

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3 thoughts on “Swinging

  1. I personally think what you do is classed as swinging but to be honest it’s all semantics. Sexy fun is sexy fun no matter what label you put on it.

    We used to attend swingers clubs often, in fact we even travelled to Amsterdam to attend one, and that’s where my voyeuristic side comes out. Part of me would like to go back and watch my partner in a threesome with others, not to be involved myself, just to watch…ok, I now need to run this past him!

  2. This is an interesting musing and I have had similar questions about what “swinging” really is!

    But what I wanted to respond to was your thoughts on the club specifically. In my own experience, you can go to a “swingers” club and do – or not do – whatever suits you. The first time husband and I went, we had agreed that we had no expectations anything sexual would happen with others, we were simply trying to learn about what this kind of place was like and enjoy the process. Between dancing, having drinks, talking to people, and walking around watching all the sexy things happening and talking to each other about it, there was plenty to keep us occupied without actual sex! We also DID have sexual experiences on various visits but I am like you in that I don’t usually want to have sex with people unless I know them and so the possibilities are limited for me. But you never know what kind of connection you make … we met a couple at a swinger’s club who have become dear close friends, both sexually and platonically. (They have even met our parents! ) I would never have guessed THAT would happen.

  3. I think you already do have the sort of relationship, and experiences, that “Swinging” implies.
    Because, in my view, it is what YOU make it . . . rather than necessarily with WHOM you make it.
    And it is the consensual, fun and yes, kinky, aspects of “swinging” that are the key elements . . . and you certainly do have all of those!!!
    Xxx – K

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