Picture this…

I am an exhibitionist by nature, and have discovered it at quite a young age, even though back then I most definitely didn’t even know what exhibitionism meant. In my younger years – I was 9 or 10 – I used to dress up, but while outside, I would also expose myself to no one there, fantasizing that I can be seen. I was about fourteen when I exposed myself to the neighbour boy, loving it when he asked me if he could see. I was eighteen when I the first nude photos were taken of me, but it took many years before I started sharing nudes of myself.

What are your motivations for taking sexy photos?

The introduction to this posts explains it all, I think. My main motivation has, and probably always will be, to feed my own exhibitionism. However, I think over the years some other layers have been added: to feel sexy, and in the last two years, to develop my self photography.

Who are you taking them for? Who is your primary audience?

First of all I am taking them for myself, but since I love sharing them, I am also taking them for others. My primary audience definitely is my blog readers, but I am slowly (very slowly) building a following on Instagram, where I share images that are suitable for their medium, and of course referring people back to my blog for more ‘explicit’ images. In the past, before my blog really became a thing, I used to share images on Redclouds, and I loved receiving comments from total strangers. Unfortunately, there were a lot of trolls on there too.

What challenges do you face/overcome when taking such photos? What lengths have you gone to to get “that” shot?

Back when Master T still took my photos, the biggest challenge was for me to translate what I had to mind for him so he could make “that” shot. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t. Sometimes the shot was not what I wanted, and sometimes i was so much better than I had in mind. Now that I do my own photos, it’s not really easier to get the shot I want. Yes, I can take the pose I have in mind, but sometimes the framing is off, or the light or some of the other settings. It’s never easy to be photographer and model at the same time, but I have to admit that I love the challenge of it! Things will get easier soon, though. I have mentioned it before, that our son will move out this year, but we a week ago we heard that he will receive an invitation letter for a flat ‘any day now’. This means that I will soon be able to start creating my photo studio, which will make taking images easier, as I will work with studio lighting and a fixed background.

How did you feel the first time you sent/posted a sexy photo?

Nervous. I never sent naked images to people through email or in an app, but posted them on Redclouds, and that really made me feel nervous, as I had no idea who would see the images or what the reactions would be.

What are your limits in terms of what you would/wouldn’t show/do in a photo you share?

Sometimes I wonder if there is anything I wouldn’t share, but over the years I have learned that there are definitely images I will not show (again). Yes, there are images on my blog that are a bit too explicit and which I wonder if I ever should have shared, but I am just leaving them there and being more aware of what I share in future. Some images, those even more explicit than what can be found on my blog, are for Master T’s eyes only.

Have there ever been any awkward/embarrassing moments (e.g. getting caught in the act) when taking your photos?

Since my photos are mostly done indoors, and in our bedroom with the door closed, there has been no embarrassing moments. Once I have my photo studio in the room on the attic, it will also be a private space, and the door will probably always be closed too when I am busy there.

One embarrassing moment do come to mind though, and that was back when the first series of photos had been taken of me. It was with a normal camera and I had to go to the shop to get the prints (I am talking late 80’s here). I hid those photos in my closet, and one day the lady of the house where I lived back then (people of the church my uncle was a minister of), was putting away my laundry and discovered the photos. I received a stern warning and they said that this time they wouldn’t inform my uncle, but if I ever did it again, they would. I never did it again – not while I lived there, anyway!

© Rebel’s Notes

Food for Thought Friday

One thought on “Picture this…

  1. Wonderful post Marie . . . and I giggled at your “closet” story !!!
    As you know I have always enjoyed viewing your photos . . . and I’m sure I always will !!!
    Xxx – K

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