I have written stories for as long as I can remember. Sometimes they were assignments for school, sometimes they were only for me, and mostly there was something erotic in them. Not in the school assignments of course. There were times where I didn’t write, but back in 2010 I wanted a platform where I could share my stories. I started Rebel’s Notes on Blogger, put two stories on there and then stopped.
Because I had no readers. I had no idea how to get readers. At that moment I was totally unaware of the blogging community. Months later, I believe it was November, I put an image on my blog. Once again I realized: I want readers. I started searching for other sex blogs and eventually came across Vanilla Mom’s blog. I saw her link to Twitter, and another realization dawned on me: if I want readers, I would have to promote my blog.
That’s when I discovered the sex blogging community, a community where I felt welcome and accepted from the very first moment. Because of this, I dared to show more of myself, both in words and images, and I worked hard to make a success of my blog. I visited and commented on other blogs almost every day, participated in weekly memes, and chatted on Twitter. My blog became an everyday thing, something I needed to do every evening.
Up to May 2012 I participated in the memes Wanton Wednesday and Wank Wednesday, but both holders of these memes decided to stop. That’s when I jumped in and started Wicked Wednesday, because I really enjoyed participating in the other two memes and I didn’t want them to stop. Others felt the same, so starting Wicked Wednesday seemed like a natural step. I can almost not believe that we are 6 years down the line and Wicked Wednesday is still going strong! I still long for the week that I will reach 50 links, but have settled for the fact that I get an average of 20 links a week.
Besides Wicked Wednesday, I also have some other memes (all of which can be found on the Wicked Wednesday site), but I hardly have time to promote them. For those interested, those memes are:
- The Oral Sex Project: any post dealing with oral sex can be linked to this meme;
- The Menopause Diaries: if you want to share something that deals with menopause, even if it has nothing to do with sex, please feel free to link your posts here;
- Sexy Searching: this meme is for when you use search terms that have found your site to write a new and fresh post.
Also back in 2012 Erotic Meet was still a thing in the UK. Annie Player ran a group for erotic writers and artists and so many times when I saw her tweet about it, I wished I could be there too. She asked me to start a ‘branch’ in the Netherlands, but she was only involved in it for about 6 months and then it became my thing. I ran the Dutch writing group for five years, and then transferred ownership to Liza Daen, a brilliant Dutch erotic author and good friend. I wanted to concentrate on the English community, since I definitely prefer writing in English. Like English, Dutch is not my first language, but I grew up with English as a second language and only started learning Dutch just more than 20 years ago.
For 4 of the 5 years that I ran the Dutch writing group, I organized a writing competition. That competition evolved with the years, and when I decided to concentrate on the English community, I brought the competition with me in the form of the Smut Marathon, where the ninth writing round – the semi-final round – has just started.
In 2013 we went to Eroticon for the first time, and even though I already felt to be part of the sex blogging community, meeting the people in person, talking to them, feeling the love and acceptance and trust… that just confirmed to me that I have found ‘my’ people.
Of course there are also questions to be answered for this week’s prompt of Food for Thought Friday.
How did you first become aware of the blogging community?
When I discovered Twitter, I followed Vanilla Mom and then followed some of the people she did. I saw links to other bloggers on her site, and then gradually discovered that there’s an entire community out there.
What made you decide to take the plunge and join in?
I prefer to do things on my own, but since I wanted feedback on my words and images, I had to overcome a fear of rejection and just jump in and do it. It was scary as hell at first, but I have no regrets for doing it!
How did you decide on the type of content you would share?
I had always known it would be erotica and images. I needed a place for my erotic words and since I had shared images of myself before on sites like Redclouds, it was a natural step for me to share images on my own site. However, that was damn scary too. I think I could have handled negative comments on my words a lot easier than negative comments on my images.
In the beginning of the blog I shared some personal experiences, but wrote about myself in the third person, as Rebel. Gradually I started using the first person narrative and when I once started sharing, I shared everything honestly and openly.
Have you achieved the goals you wanted when you started blogging and have these changed over time?
I don’t think I had any goals when I started my blog, other than wanting readers, and yes, in that I have succeeded (thanks to all who have read and carried on reading my words over the years!).
During the years my main goal has always been to keep on creating content and to give back to the community what it has given me: love and acceptance and trust. I will continue to pursue this goal for as long as I have my blog.
One of the things I really, really want to do with my blog is to make money, the way Kayla and Molly and others do. That is hard work, and it seems every time I sit down to start working in it, life throws me a curve-ball. I am still contemplating what exactly I want, how to fill in this goal, and how it fits in my life. To be continued…
What have been the most positive aspects of being a blogger?
To be part of this community.
One of the most precious things that can happen to a blogger (in my opinion) is to receive comments where people thank you for writing about a specific subject, because reading about your experiences helped them in some or other way. That’s precious, and that’s why I write honestly about everything, because there might be one person out there who you can help.
Have there been any negative aspects of being a blogger?
I am thankful to say that I have had very little negativity in my almost 9 years of blogging. I am quite thankful for this. Yes, of course some negative things have happened, but nothing huge enough to have made a lasting impression.
Blogging seems to be in my blood. Sharing is in my blood. Helping and being kind to others is in my blood. I have always been a hard worker and when I focus on something, I really focus, but one thing I have discovered during my blogging career is that I am also strong at organizing.
I am thankful to have discovered this community and to have been welcomed to be a member of it, and I will always try to make newcomers feel as welcome as I did those years ago.
© Rebel’s Notes