There are many wounds in my heart that cannot seem to heal, as the pain that has caused those wounds have not yet stopped. Grief for my life as it was is what causes the pain, but I push it way back to a dark corner of my mind, and prefer not to think about it, because if I do, I would not be able to stop my tears and I will literally make myself sick. Reading Scandarella’s post (link below) reminded me how much I crave a different pain to drown out the pain of my grief.
In an attempt to heal myself, I have enrolled in a five week program at our fitness center. It’s a program to lose weight and get fit, both of which are very important to me. If I walk up two flights of stairs to the attic, I am so out of breath that I can barely catch it and my heart pounds so hard in my chest that I fear something bad might happen. Also, I am continuously gaining weight and I really try to get back to LCHF, but then I have a bad day or something ‘bad’ happens and I eat cookies and sweets again. I hope this program, these five weeks, will be the stick I need to get back to LCHF. I have already had my first training session on Wednesday, and by the time this goes live, I will have had my first compulsory group session. This program stops on 31 July and by then I will know whether I will continue going to the fitness center twice a week, or stop.
I might keep you posted on my progress, but for now, it’s time for some sexy links of the past week!
For the next two pieces I am linking, I am biased. Both Scandarella and Amy of Coffee and Kink has written stories for Masturbation Monday, using my prompt image as an image but also in their words. Amy’s Canvas has a sexy setting and something I can totally picture myself in, but Ella Scandal’s Picking At Old Wounds totally blew me away and had me in tears. Such powerful writing and what a release for the main character!
I love how honestly Exposing40 writes about her relationship(s) and the invisibility that can go with it. I love it even more that she has told her neighbours about her connection to EA.
Looking back on my life and the choices I have made in previous relationships, I sometimes wish I had done it differently, but then remember that all those experiences made me who I am today. This week Julie’s post, Release made me think of that.
You might all know that F Dot Leonora is writing one story for Wicked Wednesday, and one for Masturbation Monday, each with a new episode every week. Yesterday she started a third story, about Jeanne, and Jeanne is connected to Eliza (of Wicked Wednesday) and Sabrina (of Masturbation Monday. If you haven’t been following Leonora’s writing, you should start now.
There is something so incredibly stunning about the image Bibulous One has used in his Sinful Sunday post, The Birch. The frills, the deep red and the ‘implement’ against her slightly reddened skin. It’s brilliant!
May More has posted images that are surreal and sexy at the same time, and she cleverly called her post, My Man’s Best Friend.
Such a clever image by Books1799, since he called it ‘Hand Alone‘. It made me look for his hand, only seconds later to realize that there is much more than only his hand in this image!
Prompts are a great way to inspire you to a new post, whether they have prompts or not. These are the ones currently running:
|Meme||Prompt||Date(s) to link|
|Masturbation Monday||Week 199 (Elliott Henry)||22 to 26 June 2018|
|Wicked Wednesday||Prompt #317: Interest||23 to 28 June 2018|
|Food for Thought Friday||F4TFriday #53 – A Few Of Our Favourite Things||22 to 28 June 2018|
|Sinful Sunday||Diptych||1 July 2018|
|Kink of the week||Shaving||16 to 30 June 2018|
|Elust #109||Elust submissions July||1 to 8 August 2018|
Prompt 316 for Wicked Wednesday was ‘Release’ for which 26 posts were linked. The top 3 was done by Sub Bee and she chose:
Tips & tricks
You’ve been in a BDSM setting, a scene and it goes wrong in some or other way. What do you do? Amy of Coffee and Kink gives advice: My Scene Went Wrong, What Now? – A Guide to Getting Back on Track.
Last but not least
Another follow-up on my professional life: there has been some feedback as there was a conversation about me and my future, and the feedback was quite positive, which I am relieved about. But, I will not be fully at ease or less stressed until decisions have been made and announced. It might take a couple of weeks more before this is finally done. Yep, it’s a game of hurry-up-and-wait!
© Rebel’s Notes