half of me

Self-esteem and self-love are the opposites of fear: the more you like yourself, the less you fear anything.
~ Brian Tracy

I have seen others taken full frontal images of themselves and have absolutely love their images. As I was setting up my camera in the bedroom, I sat naked on the bed while the camera connected on the phone. The first image I saw was part of me on the screen. Half of me. I thought it would make a nice image, and with those other images in mind, I took a couple. I straightened my back and clicked the button to take the image.

I only saw the image again when I downloaded it from the camera. I didn’t like it. My tummy looks too large. My breast doesn’t look as firm on the image as it in fact is. The photo was not good and I decided that I don’t want to share it.

Then I remembered… this month was about self-love. Self-love through self-photography. I looked at the image again. I traveled back in time to when I was younger and remembered what I looked like then. But, I thought of more. My body carried and delivered two healthy babies. It was fairly good at gymnastics and it carried me through five years of military service. It gave me lots of pleasure (and others too). My body is always with me, and where it might not be the ideal of every other person, it is mine. I should love it. It has done so much for me, meant so much to me, so how could I hate it?

I looked at the picture again and turned it into black and white. Everything I saw in the color photo was still there, but the version in grey-tones help to see me in a more positive way. For now, the color version is still a bit harsh… but I know it will get better. Not the photo, but the way I look at it…

half of me
Showing half of me… and trying to love it.

© Rebel’s Notes

Wicked Wednesday
February Photofest 2018