Birthday Girl

You don’t get older, you just get better.
~ Shirley Bassey

All I want to do today is to turn my back on the world and wait for this day to pass.

What I will do, however, is to have cake and snacks with my husband, kids, grandkids and my best friend, because they will not allow me to be alone on my birthday. Last year, on the morning of my fiftieth birthday, I visited my mom in hospital. I celebrated my birthday then because she wanted it. Today, before everyone arrives, I will be at mom’s grave. I have to. For me.

back tattoo

© Rebel’s Notes

29 thoughts on “Birthday Girl

  1. Grief is just a horrible thing isn’t it. Memories are so precious even when they hurt so much xxx

  2. Happy birthday!

    That’s a beautiful pic!

    I’m so sorry you’ve been having such a hard time. I’m glad you’ve got people around who want to celebrate you!

    And a whole lot of us who can’t be there celebrate you too! You do so much for others! I hope your birthday lasts at least a week, and everybody spoils you rotten.

    See you at Eroticon!

  3. Happy birthday Marie – I am so sorry that it is clouded by sorrow. That image is beautiful and heartbreaking at once – as are our lives. We only know each other from afar, but my heart goes out to you. I wish you healing and grace.

  4. Happy Birthday Marie. You are a remarkable woman who does so much for others with all you wonderful endeavours. You look gorgeous in your photo. xx

  5. So sorry you had a horrible start to the weekend with your crappy journey on top of dealing with tough memories and grief. I hope you were able to enjoy some of your day. This photo is beautiful. I’ve really enjoyed your self portraits this month. Xx

  6. Happy Birthday, Marie! I hope the day is just what you want and need it to be. I too visit my mother’s grave on my birthday and find it immensely comforting. I hope you do too.

  7. Happy Birthday, Marie. It’s so confusing to have these intertwining feelings of the joy of being loved and the grief of losing someone you love… I hope the joy of being with people you love on your birthday brings you some peace. Big hugs. <3

  8. As someone that’s coming off the worst year of my life, and turning 50 this week, please know you aren’t alone. I’d rather hibernate than celebrate. It’s hard. Getting older is hard, but it sure beats the alternative. Wishing you a better year ahead. Hang in there!

  9. happy birthday to you happy birthday to you
    happy birthday happy birthday
    happy birthday to YOU
    hope you had a lovely day – eating cake and being with family

  10. Happy Birthday Rebel. Big day for you I think. Including your Mum in your time today seems very telling to me. I hope you get reassurance and love from the visit. Sending you hugs…
    Indie oxox

  11. Oh, Marie – I hope you have the birthday that, if not the one you want, is at least one you can enjoy a bit. I wish you many happy returns in the spirit of love and thanks for all the things you do the for the sex-positive community xx

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