Allow me to talk about aspects of our relationship, the fascination I have for Histoire d’O and the similarities between the two. I frequently call the movie my ‘training video’. Each time I see it, I discover more aspects of my submissive self.
Continued from… The Story of O (6) – Sweet Terror
The number of times Master T had told me this cannot be counted.
It is not that I am a brat who prefers to be made to do something, or that I am disobedient most of the time. Far from that.
The times he needed to tell me to obey, were when I was unsure that I could handle what he wanted to do to me and I moaned or tried to move away from his hands. Telling me to obey was always his way of getting me back to the here and now, to remind me that I can trust him fully and that he knows what I can handle and what not.
Master T is not a big man and definitely not a man who I can wrestle for him to physically force me to obey him. I think if we – Master T and I – get into wrestling I will win every time. Physical force is not part of our D/s dynamic. No, Master T’s voice and eyes are enough to make me do what he wants me to do. The tone of his voice when he tells me to listen – to obey – is enough. It’s the equivalent of wrestling parties between other couples. When Master T tells me to obey, I do. Sometimes he doesn’t even have to say the word. The look in his eyes will be enough.
The scene from Histoire d’O, where René holds O against him while another man licks O’s pussy is so powerful. Being with the one you love, the one that owns you and then being given to another lover is special. Master T has never held me like this when he offered me to someone else, but symbolically he did.
Some thoughts come to mind…
… sitting at a table in a restaurant with The Talker, and Master T telling him that I am wearing no underwear and ready to go upstairs. He offered me to The Talker, the way René offered O to the other man.
… Master T sitting in a recliner next to the bed where I lay face-down, while Master B massaged my back, my bottom, later my front and the fucked me in all holes. Master T documented every move as an image on the camera. He had given me to Master B for those moments.
… my fiftieth birthday, where I sat between Master T and Mister Silent and a hand moved to between my legs. Master T smiling at me while Mister Silent brought me to an orgasm. Master T kissing me while Mister Silent fucked me with the Njoy Eleven. Master T recording my moans on camera while Mister Silent fingered my cunt.
Those were all moments where Master T had offered me to others and more of these moments will follow. Each time I will obey. I will do what Master T expects of me: to give myself to these other men, but always with him close to me, because without him, it’s just not the same.
To be continued… The Story of O (8) – Giving & Wanting
© Rebel’s Notes