You are in a D/s relationship with your life partner with whom you live in one house and… you have kids. You do not want to tell the kids (yet) about the nature of your relationship. Maybe you never want to tell them. You want to keep your relationship low profile, but, you cannot go without being dominated or dominating for too long. Most of the things you like and want to do make a noise and you know that will evoke questions from the kids. You can go to a hotel without the kids, but this is something most people cannot do every month. So how do you solve it? How do you practice ‘silent BDSM’?
This is something I asked myself some time ago… and these posts were born.
Continued from… Silence is golden (6/10)
Orgasm control comes in many forms such as forced orgasms, orgasm control and having to ask permission for an orgasm. I am not allowed to climax without permission from Master T and this too is a form of orgasm control. But, I also get tasks where He controls my orgasms. Like when He told me to edge several times a day, bringing myself to the point where I am want to orgasm, but am not allowed to. This is nice for a couple of days, to feel that edge coming nearer and to stop ‘just in time’, but then it gets frustrating because you really crave the orgasm. It had me horny and on the edge for a week and I was relieved when at last I was allowed an orgasm.
Forced orgasms is something we have engaged in more frequently than orgasm denial. Sometimes Master T brings me to orgasm and then just keeps on rubbing my clitoris for another, and another and another. Mostly the sheets end up very wet when He does this. But the worst forced orgasm is after I had one of my major climaxes that leaves my body all tingly and too sensitive to touch. Then He tells me to keep my legs spread (I always push them together after one of those climaxes) and then He softly rubs my clitoris, forcing another orgasm from me. A lot has been written and said about orgasm control and a lot will still be written and said about it. It’s one of the most common tasks in BDSM, but watch out, do not only give this as tasks, as it can become very boring to some subs. Combine it with other things on this list, such as cold and hot, to keep it interesting.
One of the most common things to do is to get your sub to ask for permission to climax. But you can expand this to other things too, like getting her to ask for permission to go to the toilet or to eat any kind of sweet things, such as candy or cake. Getting her to ask for permission for several things, focuses her attention on her submission to you.
Pinching is another way of inflicting pain without too much sound, except of course if you pinch her so hard she has to scream. I love having my nipples pinched. I don’t want to be pinched hard the moment Master T starts with it, but building it up and gradually pinching harder excites me and has on many occasions brought me to orgasm. Any part of the body can be pinched, but another one I like is having my labia pinched. This sends electric currents to my clitoris and leave me very wet.
A couple of months ago I have been trained for a submissive position. The fact that I had to sit in the same position for a certain amount of time – starting at 5 minutes and gradually building up to 10 minutes – allowed me to think about why I was sitting like that, what goal I was working to and why. My hands had to be behind my back, my legs spread and I was not allowed to talk. There are many different positions to teach a sub, but essentially it is not only about the position, but also about the psychology behind it. Please keep in mind that any position you decide on, should be physically possible for the the sub.
Remote controlled devices
There are quite a lot of remote controlled devices out there. As a sub, just imagine yourself walking in the shops and suddenly you feel the vibrations between your legs. You will have to keep on acting as if nothing is going on. Remote controlled devices can also be used at home, but watch out when you sit on the couch and the device is turned on – the sound might resonate and you might get questions.
Unfortunately not all remote controlled devices are effective enough to use. We owned a vibrating egg, but when Master T switched it on, I could barely feel anything, even in its highest setting. We also have a Lelo Tiani but we have not gotten around to use it yet. Which, coming to think of it, is actually a shame!
To be continued… Silence is golden (8/10)
© Rebel’s Notes