Comment luv: A reader’s memorable first

Sometimes you come across something that you just have to share with others. Sometimes I share it on Twitter, sometimes I share it here on my blog and add my own thoughts. This time I want to share something totally different. This is a comment that a Dutch reader, Kinquie, wanted to leave on my post about a memorable sexual first, but comments was already closed. He sent it to me in an e-mail and told me that I could post it if I wanted to. I wanted to.

This is his story…

Memorable sexual first? There are e few, as a matter of fact. The first time ever. The first time with my ex.The first time with my present wife. But the ultimate first time was the first time I had sex with a man. With my eldest and dearest friend, to be exact.

Let’s call him M. We had known each other since we were 17 (me) and 18 (he). The first time we had sex we were already in our forties. In fact, on that same occasion there were two firsts at the same time. That evening it was for the first time in my life that I told someone that I am hooked on BDSM and especially on cross-dressing. I can’t remember what kind of reaction I expected, but I remember very clearly hów he reacted. He just found it great, ‘typically me’ and besides that also very interesting. He wanted to know everything about it and at a point he asked me if perhaps I was bisexual as well.

’Yes sir!’ I answered. ‘And tonight I gonna give you the best blowjob ever!’

So, things went according plan that night. Before I went to see M., I had already decided I would seduce him that evening. I took him to dinner to the then new restaurant New York in Rotterdam. We had oysters, we had fish and we had a very nice dry white wine. M. is not much of a drinker, so after the second glass he was already in the mood. Later on we went to our favorite pub, where I had a few beers and told him about my secret BDSM-life.

At closing time we went to his place. We both took a shower and went to bed. I was so terribly horny! Like a hungry and greedy vulture I grabbed his cock and started to give him the best blow job ever. This was what I had desired for such a long, long time. I had fantasized about how it would be to have a cock in my mouth, to lick it and suck it, to feel it deep in my throat (M. is quite well hung) and I noticed that reality was far better than my wildest fantasies. Of course M. wanted his part of the party as well, meaning that he wanted to suck my dick too. But I pushed him away, afraid of coming too soon. M. on the other hand couldn’t come that easy. He was on anti-depressants already for a long time and for most people that’s a libido-killer (on me anti-depressants had quite another effect, but that’s stuff for another story).

Anyway, it gave me the opportunity to play with his cock a long, long time. I kissed it, licked it, swallowed it, had it all the way deep down my throat, I slid my tongue around it, pierced the little hole with it. I had been given some nice blow jobs by my former girlfriend, satisfying up to a point, but always I thought: I can do better than you! And that wonderful night I proved that I had always been right.

Finally I got M. almost to come. I begged him to fuck me, but he refused. Then I asked him to come on my face, in my mouth. And this he also refused (he had been quite a ladies man and didn’t want to risk to spread the big disease with the little name). So finally he came on my chest. He did make me come as well, but I went asleep with still an immeasurable hard cock. I ‘served’ my dear friend twenty, thirty times this way – I didn’t count – and then, one night, I was on my knees for him, sucking his cock once more and I was fed up with it. Not with him, but with ‘je ne sais quoi’. The arousal was over, I could not have given an explanation for it. Or maybe it was that M. had stopped taking his medicine. He went nuts for a while. That was the most fragile part of our friendship. Our ‘gay’ days were over and we had to cope with the new situation. There were a few awkward weeks, but then it was like it had always been.

Years have passed since our glorious days spent together in bed. We’re still best friends. We only need to look one another in the eye to realize there is such a deep, deep friendship. I guess this is special. Most friendships that become sexual at some point are irreversibly destroyed, but ours wasn’t. We have never had sex anymore – and frankly speaking I’m totally OK with that – but what I’ve experienced with M. was sooooo good. I still remember that morning after I gave him his and my first blow job. I was so utterly happy, so proud of him and so proud of myself. I had done what god, parents, friends and foe always had despised, were disgusted of, had found queer, and goddamn it: I’d done it! Partially an act of rebellion, for the greater part an act of lust and love, and for the utmost part an act of the deepest friendship I’ve ever had.

Would I do it again? Yes, please, but not with M. Our bi-sexual days are over. But not our shared dirtiness: he enjoys it when I show him the photos that have been taken of me, dressed up like a cheap slut. He wants to hear all about my kinky, perverted adventures, but that’s it. And that is what friendship is for me: acceptance and stimulating each other.

So, I guess, giving M. a blow job was quite a memorable first!

You can read and see more of Kinquie on his (Dutch) website 

© Rebel’s Notes

One thought on “Comment luv: A reader’s memorable first

  1. I love the defiance and self-acceptance in that. And the message about being true to yourself. Thank you for sharing that Marie and Kinquie x

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