Continued from… Day 9
Does any element of BDSM occur as a part of your submissive relationships? How do you feel about BDSM? Is it core to your submission, peripheral or non-existent (other than the submission part)?
The acronym BDSM stands for:
D: Discipline or Dominance
S: Sadism or Submission
Of the six words above, Discipline and Sadism are the two things that play the smallest part in our relationship. Sadism plays the smallest part. Discipline plays a bigger role. The training that Master T. has put me through and that He will continue with in the weeks to come is directed at making me obedient. If I do not execute His wishes, I will be disciplined. This however is the extent to which Discipline is present in our relationship. Bondage, Dominance, Submission and Masochism are very much the ‘route’ we take for our D/s relationship.
Bondage is something that both Master T. and I enjoy. He loves to see me being restrained and I love to feel the ropes tightly hugging my body. I also love the feeling of being powerless and subjected to His will.
Dominance and Submission… well, need I say more? In our relationship it is quite clear who has the dominant personality and who submits to that. Does this mean that I do not have a voice? Oh, for sure I do have, but not when it comes to our sex life. Yes, Master T. and I do talk about things and I do express my wishes, fears and desires, but in the end He is the one who decides what will happen and what He will do with all I have told Him. I trust Him to take my wishes and desires into account and to never force me into doing something I might fear. I would never want to dictate to Him how He should dominate me, but I feel communication is very importent in any relationship. He listens to me and He makes the decisiona about what will happen. That’s the way we want it: He decides; I submit.
Masochism is another element of our relationship and an element that we have only recently discovered. Or rather, which I have only recently discovered. During play I discovered that I like the pain, that it excites me and that I want more. More pain and more excitement.
Searching the internet to read about more elements of BDSM, I came across an interesting article. There two cornerstones are mentioned as essential key elements to BDSM: control and pain, discomfort and restraint.
Control refers to the submissive who gives up control of some aspects of her activities to the dominant, who accepts the control. This, in my opinion, comes back to the D & S in the acronym BDSM. In our relationship Master T. has the control and I gladly hand it over to Him!
Pain, discomfort and restraint… According to the article it is not BDSM if there is no pain, discomfort and restraint involved. It does not have to be physical pain, discomfort or restraint, but it can also be on an emotional or psychological level. In our relationship, pain, discomfort and restraint is present on different levels. I need them to be present. Linking the pain, discomfort and restraint to the BDSM acronym, I think it comes back to the Bondage and Masochism part of it.
How do I feel about BDSM?
I need it in my life. I need to be restrained, to feel the ropes around me, to not be able to go anywhere, to be forced to sit or lie still, to be forced to concentrate on what is to come, to submit myself to His will and to feel the pain that goes with it. It makes me forget about many things and makes me focus on only one thing: what happens between Master T. and me. Not only do I need to feel the physical aspects of my submission, but I need the mental aspects too. I need to feel that I am His property, that He is my Owner. I need it to be able to let go of all control, to just let things happen.
I need this in my life to keep my focus. It is part of who I am.
To be continued… Day 11
© Rebel’s Notes