information - Rebel's Notes

Removing hairs

information, labia, pussy, true story 8 Responses »

Aug 082013

Sometimes it take some time for me to realize if I have a problem with something, I will definitely not be the only one.

So let me explain…

As you can all see from photos on my website, I shave my pussy. I have done this since I was about 20 and after all these years I cannot imagine myself having pubic hair again. Yes, up to the point where Master T had made it compulsory for me to shave every day, I sometimes did not shave for three or four days. That, however, was the longest my pubic hair got in the last 25 years. After three or four days it irritated me so much that I just had to shave.

Ever since I had my clitoral hood piercing, I noticed that it’s more difficult to shave myself properly. Like probably so many other woman, I have a couple of hairs that seem to grow on the inside of my outer labia. When I had no piercings, those hair were easy enough to shave away, but ever since I have my clitoral hood piercing, I cannot seem to remove the hairs on the right side. The left side does not seem to be a problem. And since I have gotten my second set of labia piercings those hair started irritating me more and more. I just want my pussy to be beautiful without some stray hairs.

Of course, the first thing I did when this hairs really started bugging me was to check Internet to search for some solutions. I came across different forums and all of the people who gave advice, mentioned three options:
* sit on the side of the tub or the toilet, spread your legs wide and gently stretch the skin in different directions while shaving carefully.
* wax
* Veet

Waxing myself is not an option and using Veet to remove hairs from inside my pussy lips… nah, not an option either. So the one thing that remained was using the razor. But I have done that already… my labia keep on slipping from my fingers and from under the razor and the razor head is too thick to get in the ‘corner’ where I want to remove hair.

Then I had a bright idea…

I bought some disposable razors. The heads of these razors are thin and rectangular. I lay down on bed and pulled my labia up and sideways to stretch the skin. There they were – those hairs I cannot seem to remove when I shower and shave myself. I carefully removed them and thought I had removed all of them, but a couple of days later I discovered more stray hairs. Again I tried to remove it with a disposable razor, but I did not succeed. I grabbed my tweezers and pulled the hairs out one by one. It stung, but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I had no discomfort at all after I pulled the hairs out.

It takes some time for the hairs inside my outer labia to get long enough to irritate me, but once it does I will apply this combined method to remove them – the disposable razors and the tweezers.

I know now I am not the only one with this problem. There are more out there and maybe you are one of them. Do you have a different method of removing those hairs and do you care to share your method? Sometime in the foreseeable future I will also try professional waxing, but for now at least I have found a solution to remove those stray hairs!

© Rebel’s Notes

Preparing for anal sex

anal sex, information, true story 5 Responses »

Jul 082013

I have written a lot about anal sex and have never made a secret of the fact that I enjoy anal sex. A lot. In fact, my most intense orgasms come from anal play.

There is one thing about anal sex that I have never written about: preparing for anal sex. I have found a couple of blog posts on this subject:

Two of them mention to get clean before anal sex by using an anal douche. Searching for product reviews on anal douches I could only find a couple of links:

Every time that there is any kind of anal play, I have this bugging thought in the back of my mind that there might be a mess. It’s not that I think about it constantly and that it takes away all pleasure of anal stimulation, but it is a thought that returns every time. I’m always afraid of being embarrassed or embarrassing those around me. More the latter than the former, I think. I do not prepare myself every time I think I might have anal sex or that there will be any kind of anal stimulation, here at home. However, when we have a date, I always try to I prepare myself properly, mostly by using an anal douche, because I really want to avoid any kind of mishap.

Source: konachan.com

Some years ago I have bought the Colt Anal Douche and it works okay, but since I fill the bulb 2-3 times, I tire quickly by having to bend myself in an almost uncomfortable position to reach my backside. I have been searching online for quite some time to find a better product which will make preparation easier. I just never settled on what I want. Whenever I saw something that I could attach to our water system, it was not from a local store and I did not want to order it because I did not know for sure whether the fitting will really be okay for our taps. In the meantime I have found a product that totally fit my ‘needs’ and I will soon be doing a review of it.

For now, I leave you with some Anal Sex Tips:

Make sure you eat enough fibers. And because you eat lots of fibers, you have to drink lots of water. This combination helps you to have frequent bowel movements and not be constipated. There is nothing more hurtful than being constipated and engaging in anal sex.
Clean yourself before anal sex by using an anal douche. Allow for 1-2 hours to make sure you have expelled all water before having anal sex.
Always – yes always! – use lube during anal sex. A silicone-based lube lasts longer.
Start with external stimulation and proceed gradually. Use a finger, a toy. Start small and build it up. Foreplay is very important.
Wait until you are highly excited before penetration is attempted.
When you see some leftovers after anal sex, do not panic as this is perfectly natural. Even if you have used an anal douche, some brown residue which is a combination of feces matter and the mucus membranes could be seen. You cannot stop the mucus membranes from working by using an anal douche. If you see these leftovers, just relax, take a shower together and go back for more sex.

More tips:

If you have any tips regarding anal sex, please leave a comment below.

Most of all, when you engage in anal sex, just remember to relax and enjoy it! I know I do, and even more so when I feel confident after I have cleaned myself inside out!

© Rebel’s Notes

Kink of the week #13: Electrical Play

domination, information, kink of the week, meme, submission, submissive 10 Responses »

Jun 212013

Uh… no thanks.

That was my first reaction when I saw this week’s topic. I frequently look at short porn clips on PornHub or RedTube. When I search for BDSM clips, electrical play always pops up too. Yes, I have clicked some of those to look at them but to be honest, it scares me. The idea of electrical shocks really scare me. But maybe by researching this kink some more, I might come to understand it better and fear it less.

What is electrical play or electro play?
I visited several websites to read about electrical play and learn more about it.

Erotic electrostimulation (abbreviated e-stim and also known as electrosex) is a human sexual practice involving the application of electrical stimulation to the nerves of the body, with particular emphasis on the genitals, using a power source (such as a TENS, EMS, Violet wand, or made-for-play units) for purposes of sexual stimulation. Electrostimulation has been associated with BDSM activities, and erotic electrostimulation is an evolution of that practice. Erotic electrostimulation is the use of electrostimulation in an erotic or sexual manner versus the more sadistic or painful applications in BDSM.
(Source: Wikipedia)

Electro Sex is very simply the application of electrical charges to your erogenous zones for the purposes of stimulation.
(Source: Bondara)

What does it feel like?
My eye fell on this piece of text when I read about electrical play on the Bondara site.

Have you ever used a muscle stimulation device (like a Slendertone for example) to tone your abdominal muscles? Electro Sex pads, dildos, nipple clamps and cock rings work on the same principle; lightly stimulating you with a safe amount of electricity that causes your muscles to clench.
(Source: Bondara)

What types of electro-stimulation are there?
I guess that just like with pain, people enjoy different intensities of electrical play.

Pulse based stimulation: this is the safest form of electro-stimulation. Devices use for it are TENS and EMS units, as well as some devices sold for erotic purposes. A pulse type waveform coming from these devices is designed to safely stimulate muscles and nerves.
Electrostatic stimulation: high voltage devices are used to generate a spark which can jump to the body. The ultraviolet wand is the most commonly used device for electrostatic stimulation.
They work by ionizing the air between the device and the body. This small amount of superheated air is both very hot and contains a lot of ozone which is very reactive and destructive to human tissue. Most of these devices also give off intense ultraviolet light right next to the skin which is known to cause damage and skin cancer.

Source: tumblr.com (Photo by Carnal Image)

AC/DC stimulation
There are a variety of devices in this category such as cattle prods, batteries, hand crank generators, home stereos and various other adapted or homemade devices. In general, these are the most dangerous forms of electrostimulation. They were not designed for use on the human body and typically can generate far too much power to be safe. Many are also not properly isolated. They can cause burns, electrochemical changes in human tissue, muscle damage and even be fatal. The effect is also often far from erotic.
(Source: Guide to Erotic Electrostimulation (c) 1998 by D. Williams, MD)

Safety
On all the sites I visited to find more information about electrical play, there was a paragraph for safety. If you want to engage in this kind of play, please make sure you take all safety measures into account. Educate yourself!

Conclusion
After reading about electrical play, I am not convinced that I would ever want to try it. When reading that the violet wand can cause you skin cancer, I shivered. If I remember correctly the violet wand leaves beautiful red lines when used on someone’s back, but I prefer to get those lines from a knife than from anything that conducts an electrical current. This is not my kink.

© Rebel’s Notes

Kink of the Week #11: Furries

information, kink of the week, meme 8 Responses »

Jun 072013

When I saw the subject, the first thing that sprung to mind was furry toys or plush toys. I like plush toys, but definitely not as a kink, so decided to google ‘furries’. I was surprised to learn that it had absolutely nothing to do with plush toys.

Source: wikipedia

What exactly are ‘furries’ or ‘furry fandom’? Of course I read through an article on Wikipedia, in which I found this:

The furry fandom is a subculture interested in fictional anthropomorphic animal characters with human personalities and characteristics. Examples of anthropomorphic attributes include exhibiting human intelligence and facial expressions, the ability to speak, walk on two legs, and wear clothes. Furry fandom is also used to refer to the community of people who gather on the Internet and at conventions.

And…

According to four different surveys, 14–25% of the fandom members report homosexuality, 37–52% bisexuality, 28–51% heterosexuality, and 3–8% other forms of alternative sexual relationships. Of the furry fans that reported being in a relationship (approximately half of the surveyed population), 76% were in a relationship with another member of furry fandom. Examples of sexual aspects within furry fandom include erotic art and furry-themed cybersex. The term “yiff” is most commonly used to indicate sexual activity or sexual material within the fandom—this applies to sexual activity and interaction within the subculture whether in the form of cybersex or offline.

Sexual attraction to furry characters is a polarized issue within the fandom; in one survey with 4300 furry respondents, 37% answered that sexual attraction is important in their furry activities, 38% were ambivalent, and 24% answered that it has little or nothing to do with their furry activities. In a different online survey, 33% of furry respondents answered that they have a “significant sexual interest in furry”, another 46% stated they have a “minor sexual interest in furry”, and the remaining 21% stated they have a “non-sexual interest in furry”. The survey specifically avoided adult-oriented websites to prevent bias.

Searching some more, I found that there’s an entire website on Furry Fandom. Here they explain what furries are, what furry fandom is, they show furry costumes and talk about furry art and you can find dates and more information on furry conventions.

I can say that this subject and researching it was kind of an eye-opener to me. I had no idea that this even existed, even though I now realize I have seen this in art. This was the section of the Furry Fandom page that had the most of my attention and made me realize that I am not into furries at all. Many times I have used anime art on my site to illustrate some of my stories. There is a gold mine of art from various brilliant artists on the site of Konachan. I sometimes search for the right picture to go with my story for a very long time and I seem to always reject the pictures where the girls have animal ears on tails. Somehow, they just do not appeal to me. I don’t find them sexy. I don’t think they fit in with my stories.

These three pieces of artwork come from the site of Konachan, but these are examples of pictures I will not use to illustrate my stories, simply because of the ears and tails. I respect people who have this as their kink, but I guess this shows that I am totally not into furries at all.

© Rebel’s Notes

Female orgasms

information, orgasm, true story 16 Responses »

May 152013

During the orgasm race, at times I felt guilty that I can climax quite easily and have multiple orgasms, but others seem to have so much problems to even get to one orgasm. On the same day I was discussing this on Twitter with one of the other competitors in the orgasm race, my best friend said more or less the same thing in an email she sent me. She cannot get off with her husband, but she can have multiple orgasms when she does it herself. For me it’s the other way around: when I masturbate, I have to really do my best to get to more than one orgasm, but when Master T rubs my clitoris or fingers me, I climax over and over until it’s an enormously glorious wet mess.

This, as well as thinking about the different women I have been with, made me wonder whether there is any literature on this. I found some and I will list what I have found at the end of this post, so you can read the full articles. However, I want to highlight some of the things from the articles and give my opinion on that.

Quoting from the article When Women Have Trouble Reaching Orgasm:

A woman should never feel pressured into having an orgasm by society, by the man in her life, or even by reading this article. When it comes to sex, pressure has just the opposite of the intended effect . . . even if the person putting the pressure on you is you, yourself. If you’re desperate to have an orgasm, that desperation is only going to make it tougher for you to achieve orgasm. The most important step in becoming orgasmic is learning to relax. And, if you really don’t ever want to have an orgasm, then that’s okay, too, as long as you are honest with yourself, and you don’t just say that because you think that you can’t learn.

Reading the first part of this quote, I wondered whether the orgasm race might have had the wrong effect on those who cannot easily reach a climax? I know I thought about orgasms a lot more during the race, but it did not make me feel any pressure as I don’t have problems to reach a climax. But for those who cannot easily reach orgasm, what about them? If they focused on orgasms as much as I did, would it not have made it more difficult for them to reach their orgasms?

From the article Can’t Orgasm? Here’s Help for Women, I quote:

The first and most important lesson is to practice developing a balance of tension and relaxation during sexual activity.

… and …

The type of tension that helps women reach orgasm is muscle tension (myotonia). Many women have the mistaken impression that they should relax and “just lie there” because they’ve heard that relaxation during sex is important. But it turns out that muscle tension is often necessary for an orgasm.

… and …

So, where’s the relaxation part of this equation? In the brain. During sex, a woman should be focused simply on feeling the sensations of the stimulation.

The above I recognized immediately. When I masturbate, I love to lie on my back, my legs spread and bent, my feet together. I want to be propped up on a pillow and able to see myself. I love to be naked and to look at my body. My mind is empty, all I think about is me, my hand, my body. All I see is myself. All other thoughts are banned from my head. I spread my legs as wide as possible and the more I tense the muscles in my legs, the stronger my orgasm will be. Funnily enough, when I told my best friend this, she told me that she is totally the opposite: she has to press her legs together, her hand between her legs and only then she can reach her orgasm. If she spreads her legs, it’s a no go for her.

Now I know I am one of the lucky ones. I can orgasm easily, but I have evidence around me of women who just cannot reach an orgasm that easily, whether they do it themselves or not. And some of them just have to do it themselves, as a man cannot bring them to orgasm. I can orgasm quite quickly, but for other women it takes quite some time and work before they are able to reach a climax. I can have multiple orgasms; other women can have only one and then have to recover for quite some time before they can have another. Yes, women’s bodies are very different, just like, I suppose, that of men.

So when I have multiple orgasms, do each and every orgasm leave me spent and satisfied, the way only one orgasm might leave women who can reach only one? No, it does not. Multiple orgasms are a lot of ‘smaller’ orgasms, which might or might not release some fluids, but always leaves me panting and craving for more. It’s like my body is building up to something bigger, but needs smaller releases to get there. Oh, do not get me wrong, a small orgasm can be very satisfying and depending the circumstances, I can be very happy with only one of those. However, when Master T is the one bringing me to the one orgasm after the other, I want more and more and it builds up to a point where I just need a major orgasm. To have one of those, I either need simultaneous anal and clitoral stimulation, or I spread my legs wide, tense my muscles and ignore all urges for smaller releases. The signs of a major orgasm is when my nipples harden, my inner thighs tingle, my stomach tighten and then all of those feelings explode in my pussy, leaving me spent and not able to handle any kind of touch for minutes after.

I would love to hear from other women about their orgasms, or from the men out there, how their special ladies climax. And, are male orgasms as diverse as female orgasms?

Corset perils

information, sexy 2 Responses »

Apr 042013

(click to enlarge)

In preparation for Eroticon – something that I was busy with for months before the actual event took place – I wanted to replace the satin ribbon in my two overbust corsets for a more sturdy string. I have bought an underbust corset which had that kind of string in it and it was then that I decided the ribbons needed to be replaced. The ribbons in the overbust corsets were barely long enough, even almost too short. The string in the under bust was quite long and seemed to be in one piece, where there were two ribbons in the overbust corsets.

So my quest began and I found a place where I could buy some string. I had 5 meters in mind, but decided to ask the lady’s opinion. She told me that 3 meters was more than enough. It was not. It was even shorter than the two ribbons combined. I was SO disappointed when I discovered this. I wanted to go with the ribbons, but then decided to search for corset string online. It took me a while to find the right word combination to search by, but once I did, the rest was easy. The first local site I found only had only white string, but I wanted both black and white. The second one had both. I ordered it and less than a week later I had the string, in time to get my corsets ready for Eroticon!

During my search online, which took the best part of an hour, I came across two informational videos. The first one is about lacing your corset. When I laced mine with the newly bought too-short-string, I wanted to use the bunny ear lacing technique. However, I did it wrong the first time and this video helped me to lace it correctly the second time.

The second video I want to share might help more women out there. All the times that I wore a corset, Master T had to help me put it on. I have always wondered how other women managed to put on a corset without help. I am not very good at working behind my back, but with a bit of practice and the help of this video, I am sure that I will be able to manage.

Copyrighted content

information, meme, thoughts, true story, Wicked Wednesday 32 Responses »

Jan 302013

I was going to post something totally different (and sexy) for this week’s Wicked Wednesday, but something happened on Monday that just left this feeling in me that I had to write this post.

I have been so angry! I still feel the irritation bubbling up when I just think of it!

On Monday I was informed that content of my site was copied and posted on someone else’s blog and whether I was aware of it or have maybe given permission for it. I have never given permission to anyone to copy any of my work. No one! But still, following the link I was sent, there it was: numerous of my posts could be read on Provocative Jane. I was at my work at the time, but wanted to take action immediately. I commented on one of MY posts on Provocative Jane, telling her that I have not given her ANY permission to repost my content. I asked Provocative Jane to immediately remove ALL of my posts from her website or she would be reported! Three hours later I checked and all my posts were removed. But, my name still popped up on her site when I did a search. Why? Because she had also reposted a post in which Molly had mentioned me. I immediately informed Molly. And when I came home, I joined Molly in informing other bloggers that their content was stolen by Provocative Jane. There is absolutely no original content on this blog and it seems like she is stealing content using the RSS feed of other blogs.

copyright This is just so wrong! How can someone just steal someone else’s work? I have a notice in my sidebar, asking people not to copy any of my content without asking for permission. Also, the footer of my blog has a clear ‘all rights reserved‘ message. Why do someone like Provocative Jane just ignore that? And even if a blog has NO copyright notice on it, isn’t it just good manners to ASK before you repost something on your own blog the way that Provocative Jane did? I don’t mind people linking back to my posts. In fact, I welcome that. But do not copy it without permission from me. That is just so wrong! Disrespectful!

Doesn’t Provocative Jane or anyone else who steals content from blogs understand that we work very hard to make our blogs what it is? That is is our intellectual content, our creations? I know how much work I put into my blog and I think every other (erotic) blogger works just as hard. I work on my blog every single day of the week for as many hours as I can. It’s like having a second job – a job I thoroughly enjoy. The fact that I share my words online gives NO ONE the right to just copy my words! All words on there are MINE. Everyone may read them, everyone may link back to them, everyone may tell others about them, but NO ONE is allowed to just steal them!

I will keep an eye on the blog of Provocative Jane and I will inform people when I see their work on there and I suspect it has been re-posted without permission. I will do the same with any other website(s) I might come across that unrighteously re-post any content from any other blogger. I will inform the bloggers and I will report the website for theft.

But not all that happened on Monday was negative…

The theft by Provocative Jane has shown me yet again how loving and caring the erotic blogging community is. First there was Ruby who warned me. Then I warned Molly. Then Molly started warning lots of people whose posts she found on the site of the provocative bi…. uh, Jane. I joined in some hours later, but played only a small role in warning people, since Molly had already warned a lot of people. Those people in turn warned others who they knew. It was like a pebble had been thrown in a pond. The ripples spread out to reach as many people as possible and warn them about the theft of their content. We all watch out for each other. We help each other. We give each other advice. We tease each other lovingly. We are fond of each other. We are proud of each other.

And we will continue to be just this: a tight community looking out for each other.

Now, do you have copyright on your site? If not, you might want to put it on there, because just like my words are my property, your words are yours. Do you have any advice for anyone one how to improve their copyright? Please let them know. Let’s keep on watching out for each other!

Note: In the meantime the website of Provocative Jane has been taken down.

© Rebel’s Notes

The prompt for this week’s Wicked Wednesday was #proud
Click the button to see who else is playing or to link your own post.

Third blogoversary

blogoversary, information, reading, socializing, thoughts, writing 9 Responses »

Jan 262013

Huh? The third? The first was on 2 November 2011 and now the third is today? What happened to the second? And why the change of date?

Yes, I have to explain.

The very first post for Rebel’s Notes was written on 26 January 2010. The second and third were both posted the next day and then it took 8 months before I posted the fourth. The fourth was an announcement that I was back, but it took just over a month for me to really be back. Why did it take so long to get my blog started? Because I just did not know what I really wanted to do with the blog. I wanted a place to post my stories, but I also wanted people to know that I have posted them. Then again, I did not think that anyone out there was waiting to read the words I write. While in doubt, I just did not post anything.

There was a bit of confusion on my side too when I started the blog. Looking back on it now, it’s clear that I needed to grow and so did the blog. If you have followed along from the beginning or have read older posts, you will see that I started the blog off talking about myself in the the third person. Somewhere along the line I changed that. Whenever I wrote a fantasy, it was in the third person narrative, but all true sex stories or posts about our D/s relationship were written in the first person. This was just part of the development that I and my blog have gone through.

It took me 9 months to figure out how I wanted to do with the blog before it really started to take shape. I wanted to write for myself, but I also wanted to tell others about it, using social media. This brought me to Twitter and this lead me to meet such wonderful people and find a warm home, love and respect in the online erotic community. And I am even about to meet some wonderful people of this community – people I admire!

3years1 Back in November 2011, when I posted about my first blogoversary, I ignored the first four posts on this blog. Somewhere during 2012 I decided that I should acknowledge the birth date of my blog to be the same date as when I posted my very first post. Even if it took 9 months to really get this going, and probably another couple of months to get the narratives right, the birth date of my blog is 26 January 2010.

So, today is my blog’s third birthday!

Without you, dear readers, this blog would never have been a success at all. I know I would eventually have gotten bored to write and never have a word read by anyone. Thank you for reading, for returning to read more and for commenting on my posts and photos!

© Rebel’s Notes

Christmas is coming…

Christmas, EdenFantasys, erotic, information, sexy No Responses »

Dec 102012

Fifteen days from now Christmas will be upon us. Many of us have long started with our Christmas shopping. Some of us still need gift ideas. What about making this Christmas a sexy one? Oh, I know, if you celebrate Christmas with the family – grandparents, parents, children, grandchildren, aunts, uncles, cousins – well, I guess then it’s better not to make the Christmas too sexy. But maybe you are celebrating Christmas with a special group of friends. And maybe, just maybe you can buy some sexy toys to spice up the holidays.

EdenFantasys, an online sex shop, has a gift center on their website. They have different categories in it:

For Her
For Him
For a Friend
For Couples
Holiday Themed
Gifts under 50 dollars
Make your own gift set
Give a gift card

Now I can go on and describe several items in those categories. I can tell you about the fun vibrators in the ‘For Her’ section or the cock rings in the ‘For Him’ section. You can look at the holiday themed sweet candy cane glass dildo and consider whether you want to buy this for a friend or I can go ahead and tell you that I have bought myself the Lelo Insignia Tiani 2 and will soon be using it.

But, I am not going to do that, as I got totally distracted when looking at the ‘Sweet and Sexy Gift Center’ of EdenFantasys. In a flash I had this fantasy. I imagined myself in another place, another time. No kids around. No family obligations during Christmas time. Just a group of friends, somewhere in a cabin, together for the holidays. Members of this group of friends have shared sexy times before, sometimes two of them got together, sometimes four of them. But never have all of them been together in the same room at the same time. Never before have their been eight of them – four couples.

After a nice Christmas dinner they relaxed in the lounge of the cabin – on the floor in front of the fireplace. It was Christmas Eve and they were about to unpack the gifts. And when they did, the fun starts. They unpack vibrators and dildo’s and condoms. Clamps and whips and blindfolds. Body cremes and sexy lingerie. Clothes were soon piled onto the couches. The humming of vibrators were soon replaced by the moans and sounds of orgasms. I imagine the four woman tied together on their knees in a circle, asses to the outside. And the men walking around them, spanking them and fucking them – be it with fingers, vibrators or cocks.

Ahem…

I do seem to remember I was talking about the sex toys you can buy from EdenFantasys, right? And that you can buy the toys for Christmas from their sexy Gift Center. And that you might want to plan in a special Christmas dinner with sexy friends to have some hot fun afterwards… oh darn, my thoughts are back in that cabin again. Just imagine how spent and satisfied the eight of them will be after unpacking and trying all the wonderful toys they have bought from EdenFantasys?

Oh, wait, I think I am now getting my fantasy mixed up with facts…

Let me see if I can keep my attention to what I am trying to say!

EdenFantasys really makes an effort to bring a sexy Christmas to your home. Even if you are celebrating with family, you might want to surprise that special woman or man in your life with something outrageously sexy. Hop on over to the Gift Center to find the perfect gift for sexy times! Gift wrap is available on check out, so you can have your gift delivered as a nicely wrapped package.

Do you have no idea at all what toy to buy as a gift for your partner or a friend? Why don’t you give them an EdenFantasys gift card? There are gift cards in the amounts of $25, $50, $75 and $100 – more than enough to choose from! One great thing about the EdenFantasys gift cards: they never expire! Buying a gift card will mean either you or someone else can have their Christmas fun whenever they want!

Whatever you decide to do for Christmas, however you decide to celebrate it, I wish all of you a wonderful time! Be as sexy as you can be amongst family or alone with your loved one. Make it the best and sexiest Christmas you have ever had!

Oh, I feel my thoughts drifting off again…

I know we will be swamped up in family for our Christmas celebrations. But when we go to bed that evening, Master T. and I will be alone. Maybe I should surprise Him this year and dress myself as Santa’s Sweetie or get another costume from the Sexy Lingerie section at EdenFantasys. Just think about the fun we can have if I play out a role as one of Santa’s helpers and pretend that He is Santa. Or maybe that Santa has sent me to be Master T.’s Christmas present.

Ah, wait! Let’s get back to business. Just hop over to EdenFantasys and get your sexy things for a wonderful, sexy Christmas. Enjoy the anticipation while you are planning it! Remember, it’s the season of giving, and what better thing to give than to spread the love and sexiness!

Up to 21 December you can use the following codes to save on your order:
15% off any order: Code CANDY15
20% off orders over $50: Code CANDY20
25% off orders over $100: Code CANDY25
30% off orders over $150: Code CANDY30

And remember: free shipping for all orders over $25.

Enjoy!

Post sponsored by: EdenFantasys, a sex toy store.

Garter belts… sexy, horrid things!

information, no panties, sexy, thoughts 8 Responses »

Oct 122012

Okay ladies, I have an issue I want to discuss with you: garter belts!

We all know how sexy it is to wear stockings and garter belts. Yes, we can choose to wear hold ups, but we also all know that even though they say those things always stay in place, they just don’t always stay in place. I actually prefer stockings with a garter belt. It makes me feel a lot more confident and sexy!

But…

Yes, there is a but.

The horrid clips on those things. I am always fumbling with those! Sometimes I feel like I might panic because I cannot get those things attached to the beautiful stockings I want to wear. When at last I succeed, I feel grumpy and not sexy at all, especially if Master T. was watching me while I tried to dress myself sexy specially for Him.

The last time I was battling to get a sexy garter belt on, my thoughts started wandering. I wanted a garter belt with suspender clips on it. Suspender clips as you get on… yes, suspenders. Let me just make a distinction here.

I know that garter belts and suspender belts can be the same thing. But for this post, I will talk about garter belts, which are the things that women wear to keep stockings up and suspenders, which are the things that some men use to keep their pants up.

If I could find a garter belt with suspender clips, I could wear hold ups and clip the suspender clips to it. I will feel and look sexy and I will know that the hold ups would not sag around my ankles at any time.

The search started.

I found garter belts, with garter eyelet clips. And I found suspenders, with suspender clips. But no garter belts with suspender clips. What I did find was double grip suspender clips.

Of course these could work too, but then you would have to know for sure that it would not pull your panties down once the stockings started slipping downward due to gravity.

I decided to put my question out on twitter. I received a reply from Sock Dreams about their double grip clips and when I searched their site, I came across a garter belt with suspender clips. You would have thought that I would be ecstatic about it?

No, I was not.

Yes, it was what I was looking for. A garter belt with suspender clips. Unfortunately it was not sexy at all. Functional? Definitely yes!

So my search continues…

If anyone out there knows where I can find sexy garter belts with suspender clips on them, please let me know!

Pride & Shame

bdsm, D/s, information, submission, submissive, thoughts 10 Responses »

Oct 112012

Last week Emily of I Like Chocolate, He Likes Vanilla posted a fantasy called The Punishment. This fantasy involved several things that could be hard limits to many people and Emily put a warning at the top of her post. I admit, when reading it, there were things in there that I definitely would never do (yes, hard limits) but the general idea of being humiliated and to submit definitely excited me.

As a reaction to the shame Emily felt for writing this fantasy, Molly of Mollysdailykiss wrote her an open letter, called No Shame. And as a reaction to that, Emily responded with her own open letter, Kink Shame.

As happens with many posts that I read, I questioned myself about the subject. This time, I questioned myself about shame. Do I feel ashamed of my kinks? A blog post started forming in my head, but as it happens some times, I have to swirl the thoughts around until they make proper sentences. I decided to combine these thoughts with a saved prompt from the Submissive guide:

You have the right to be proud of what you are. Being a submissive is nothing that should ever bring you shame or feelings of reproach. Your submissive nature is a gift and should always be a source of pride and happiness.

Am I proud of being a submissive? Yes, I am.
Do I talk about it openly? No, I don’t.
Would I want to talk about it openly? Yes, I would, but I also know that most of the people I would like to talk to it about, would disapprove of my lifestyle choice.
What would I do if those people find out about my lifestyle? I will ask them to respect me for my choices, the way I respect them for theirs.

These are all questions I asked myself. But of course, the posts of Emily and Molly were about shame. Shame about your own kinks. Have I ever felt shame about one of my kinks? Yes, I have. When I first discovered anal sex, I was very fixated on it and played whenever I could, but mostly when I was alone. Why alone? Indeed, because I was ashamed of my fixation on anal play. This shame was part of me for a very long time. In the first years of our relationship, we had periods where Master T. would frequently finger my ass to bring me to orgasm. After several times I would hint for Him to not concentrate on my ass anymore. Why? Because I was ashamed of enjoying it too much. And once my craving for anal stimulation was so intense, I started hinting at it again. I just could not be without it and gradually I accepted it, up to the point that I declared myself to be an anal slut. Master T. frequently calls me one, which has made this shame disappear entirely.

Do I have other kinks that I am ashamed of? In the beginning of this year I discovered that I like pain, to a certain extent. However, I have never been ashamed of this. It was such a nice discovery and it was made together with Master T. who I could see loved the fact that I enjoyed the pain that He was inflicting on me. I know, just like Molly, I have also asked myself whether something might be wrong with me, since I want Master T. to spank me or use the flogger/cane on me; I want Him to hurt me; I want to lay down at His feet and stay there all night; I want to wear His collar all the time, feeling His dominance and my submission. Certainly wanting all this must be wrong, but then again, if it makes me happy, how can it be wrong? I have never stopped to think about these questions too much, because Master T. enjoys this just as much as I do and if there is one completely sane person in my life, it is Him. Yes, with a twisted mind, but definitely sane.

Like Emily, I look back on my childhood and know that sex has interested me from a very young age. A huge smile covered my face when I read about her swinging off door handles and rubbing the edge between her legs. I did the same, as well as sitting in the window sill and pressing the cold iron of the window frame against my pussy. I never knew why I did it, but I definitely enjoyed the feeling. And just like Emily, I knew should not be caught! I loved to be touched and groped in my teenage years – the more the better. And once I started having sex, I wanted it all the time. There were times when I thought of myself as a terrible slut, because I had two sex partners in the same week. Actually, coming to think of it, this is another shame that Master T. has helped me with. Back in the time before we officially started our relationship, but we saw each other whenever it was possible and we had sex, I would come to Him after a date, wanting to be fucked because I was not yet satisfied. He never judged me for this. We loved each other from the word go, but neither of us was ready for a serious relationship. He set me free and all He wanted was for me to tell Him everything I did, even if it was about me having sex with another man. I shared everything with Him and He never disapproved of my actions.

I guess I can ask myself the same kind of questions about my kinks, than I asked myself about my submission:
Am I proud of my kinks? I guess I am. Maybe proud is the wrong word. I have accepted my kinks to be part of who I am.
Do I talk about my kinks openly? Definitely not!
Would I want to talk about it openly? I can talk about it to Master T., but I don’t think I would easily discuss it with someone else. Maybe I would discuss it face to face with someone who is willing to discuss their kinks openly too, but it would definitely depend on the situation.
What would I do if vanilla people or family members find out about my kinks? Exactly the same as I would do when they find out about my submission to Master T.: I will ask them to respect me for my choices, the way I respect them for theirs.

We are who we are. I believe that everyone – yes, even vanilla people – have their own kinks. Maybe it will be better to channel our energy into accepting ourselves the way we are, rather than using the energy to be ashamed of ourselves. But that, I know, is easier said than done…

Have your own kink shames you want to talk about? Join the Fetlife group, Dealing with Kink Shame hosted by Emily.

Sex education – then & now

EdenFantasys, information, thoughts 4 Responses »

Sep 242012

I received an e-mail from EdenFantasys in which I was informed of their theme for September: Sex Education. As the e-mail said: educated sex is the best kind of sex.

Reading that sentence immediately made me think of myself and the way I grew up. And at the same time – as many moms would probably do – I had to think about my kids. Nowadays children are much more knowledgeable about sex than I was at the same age. Our teen knows a lot more about condoms and safe sex than I knew when I was her age, some 30+ years ago. When I was a teen, teachers and parents just did not talk about sex. It was as if they thought that when they did not talk about it, it did not exist. Of course there were some parents who did educate their children about safe sex. This was mainly to prevent them from unwanted pregnancies. But generally speaking teens did not receive any kind of sex education back then and this resulted in quite a number of teen pregnancies.

In the times we live in now, teens get sex education in high school. They learn about where babies come from, about practicing safe sex to prevent pregnancies, but also they learn about sexual transmitted diseases and how to prevent them. Also, in the present time there are a lot more parents who find it important that their children know about the these ‘dangers’ of sex.

There are quite some interesting articles about sex education on the SexIs Social, a publication by EdenFantasys. Two of those articles have quite some interesting views in them. The articles are called Is High School Sex Ed Going Too Far Or Not Far Enough? and Sex Un-Educated. Follow the links and read the articles.

I am a mom and I have always been very open to my children, talking to them about sex, about teen pregnancies (I was a teen mom) and about how to practice safe sex. One thing that I have always made very clear to my kids is that they can come and talk to me about absolutely everything! I am proud to say that up to now they always did.

But I don’t want to talk about how to raise your kids and how to make them aware of what can happen when they have sex.

What I want to talk about is ‘my’ generation. People that were teenagers some 20 – 30 years ago and grew up the same way I did: without sex education in schools and with parents who totally avoided the subject of sex. How did you go about educating yourself? Was it trial and error? In hindsight, would you have preferred to have had some sex education or was discovering things for yourself better? Did you have moments in your adult life where you read or heard about something, you did not know what it was and you ended up feeling a bit foolish that you had no knowledge about it? I for one have never ever learned how to put a condom on a man. I have never tried either. The interactions I had where a man used a condom… well, I just left it to him to put it on himself.

Okay, so here you are in your adult life and you need some sex information. Either for yourself or because you now are a parent and your kids are asking you some difficult questions. What do you do? I google and I read as much as I can about it. I have done a lot of research on anal sex, for instance. Or on different kinds of sexual relationships. Or on different kinds of sex toys. Normally I just searched on google, but I have discovered that there is quite some information on EdenFantasys. They have their Sex Guides and Tips and the Guide to Materials, where you can read what materials are used in sex toys.

But I for one prefer the SexIs Magazine on EdenFantasys where you can search for what you are looking for. There are three main categories in which the articles are shown – Sex and Society, Sexual Health and Advice. Under each of these categories you find different sub-categories, harboring a lot of articles on different subjects, such as flogger shopping, how to choose and care for your sex toys, how to give a blow job, strip club etiquette, cyber sex and much, much more! If you don’t want to scroll through the articles, just submit a search on the site and you will find what you are looking for.

Even if you have had your sex education as a teen, there is no harm in educating yourself about whatever sex subject you need information on. Reading about the different opinions of sex toys, the different kinds of relationships out there, the different views on sex… all of that helps you to form a better understanding about it and to have a more educated opinion about the subject. You owe it to yourself. Educate yourself.

PS.: I would love to hear about your experiences with sex education.

Post sponsored by: EdenFantasys, a sex toystore.

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