Realism & Magic

realismmagicRealism as noun
– the attitude or practice of accepting a situation as it is and being prepared to deal with it accordingly.
– the quality or fact of representing a person or thing in a way that is accurate and true to life.

Magic as noun
– the power of apparently influencing events by using mysterious or supernatural forces.

Magic as adjective
– having or apparently having supernatural powers.
– wonderful; exciting.

Magic as verb
– move, change, or create by or as if by magic.

The quote says: “I don’t want realism, I want magic!”

Who doesn’t want magic? Not the supernatural kind of magic, but the wonderful and exciting feelings that we all describe as magic. The beginning of a new relationship feels like magic. The birth of a child can be described as magic. Enjoying time together with loved ones can afterwards be called magic. When we use the word magic, it’s mostly to describe something that has been experiences as wonderful, as exciting.

We all want magic in our lives and we all need magic in our lives. Maybe nowadays the word people use instead of magic, is epic. Sometimes I wonder if people really stop to think how something really made them feel, if they really felt it was magic or epic, or whether they are only saying it because they think they should; because others expect them to say it. That, however, is a discussion for another time.

I almost never describe something as magic (or epic), but if I look back on some things, the word magic can be applied to it. Eroticon 2015 is the most recent experience I had that made me so incredibly happy. I was on cloud nine for quite some time, even though I had flu right after that weekend and still when I think back on Eroticon 2015, I get this intensely happy feeling inside me. Magic.

Magic applies to my marriage too. I have never been so happy and even though we are married ten years this year, and quite set in our daily routine and used to be together, I am still deeply and madly in love with Master T. Now, if that isn’t magic.

Still, if I look at the two words – magic and realism – the latter applies to me more.

I need to know where I stand. I need to know what I can expect. I need to be able to plan for things that are about to happen. I hate surprises. If you want to totally unsettle me, you should surprise me and totally disrupt my planning for a day. Surprises take me away from my realism, from the firm ground under my feet. It makes me feel like I lose control, and that is something I cannot handle, losing control. One of the definitions of realism is: the attitude or practice of accepting a situation as it is and being prepared to deal with it accordingly.

I have just said I hate surprises and it can totally ruin my day. But, I have also said that realism applies to me more. As I grew older, I have found a mechanism to deal with unexpected things. Yes, I still get upset, but if you give me half an hour (maybe less) to just make some changes in my mind, I can go along with a surprise or a total change of my plans. I can go along in such a way, that the day can turn out to be pure magic.

What I also said is that I cannot handle losing control, but then, I have handed over control to Master T. It’s something I have chosen for, to hand over control to him. Of course there are quite some things I still make decisions about, as we are not in a TPE, but for all things sexual, the decision lies with Master T. It’s something I needed to do, something I cannot be without anymore. Because I have chosen for it, because I wanted to do it, it became both my realism and my magic. Does that make sense?

“I don’t want realism, I want magic!”

Realism and magic are both part of my life. I never stop to analyze situations, I just accept them as they are, but I do realize that sometimes my realism gives me magic, and sometimes my magic changes to realism.

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6 thoughts on “Realism & Magic

  1. Your mention of the use of the word ‘epic’ made me think about how much I hear the expression ‘awesome’ used nowadays. I often wonder if the term is used too loosely.

  2. I so understand what you say about needing the realism, not liking surprises. I find that hard to deal with too. I don’t like my plans being disrupted. Probably because I’ve been doing things my way for so long. But like you, given time, I can go along with it. And sometimes it can be magical ๐Ÿ™‚
    And the last part about handing over control for sexual things makes perfect sense. When it comes to sex Sir holds all of my ropes ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. I would describe my marriage as epic, or magically. You hear of so much negativity in marriages, and mine is all about exploring, learning, coming together so beautifully. Not to say that there aren’t bumps in the road, but the journey is amazing.
    Part of why I love reading people such as yourself is because you’re realistic, and yet so happy and magical (heck, that orgasm count competition was unreal!).

  4. Perfectly put . . . “realism gives me magic”. I so agree, because the “magic” moments are always more special when they are natural and real!!!
    Xxx – K

  5. I didn’t think of magic in the epic sense – but I really like that. That’s the kind of magic I really enjoy having in my life. But, much like you, I’m more on the realism side of things. And no surprises for me either!

    xx Dee

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