Shadow Detail

This photo has been a favorite of mine from the moment I made it, back in 2000.

This literally comes from another lifetime, a life before Master T, before He was even in the picture. I was in another relationship back then, one I thought would last until my old age. Wait, I have to say that differently. When that relationship started in 1998, I thought it will last until the day I die, but by 1999 I knew it wouldn’t. However, I wasn’t prepared to admit to anyone, least of all myself, that I have yet again made a mistake. That the person I was with, was not the person I thought he was.

So many times I had shared with him that I like to have my photo taken. Nude photos. He took them, but always made me feel as if it was a burden. He was never into it with his heart. He never enjoyed it as much as I did and he always saw it as foreplay. Yes, taking photos together can be foreplay, but he started rushing the photo part to get to the sex part. So I reverted to making photos of myself when he was at work. He worked shifts and I worked only half days, in the mornings. With the kids at school in the afternoons and him off to his work, I had plenty of time to take photos. This photo was one of those. Of course, taking photos was only half the fun. Sharing the photos was the other half, and that I did. I shared them on Redclouds, which was a paying site where you could share nudes of yourself. I even met some of the men who commented on my photos there. When Master T and I hooked up on the Internet, the photo below was one of the first nudes I sent Him. One of His responses to it was that He would love to take some nudes of me, which of course He had done over and over and over again in the past years and will do over and over and over again in the years to come. And not because I want it, but because it’s a love that we share.

20150208wm polaroids past 2000-11

(click to enlarge)

© Rebel’s Notes

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