Naughty ‘n Horny

Oh, this photo… this is one of my favorites from way back when I had to make my own photos. The camera I used had a ten second timer on it and you don’t want to know how many times I had to run to get in position before the camera snapped the picture, then go back to the camera, check to see whether the photo was okay and then had to do it again because it wasn’t.

The ‘kettle’ I am using in this picture is my mom’s. I stored some of her stuff with me back then, but nowadays this ‘kettle’ is in her house. Master T and I sometimes joke about what mom would do if she knew about this photo. And who knows, we might even find an opportunity to recreate this photo.

Back then I made photos with the specific purpose to share them with men outside of my relationship, and without letting my partner of back then know that I am sharing them. Oh, I tried. I tried so many times to share it with him, to share my longing for exhibitionism with him, to get him involved in making photos, in enjoying the fun and sexiness with me. He feigned interest, but always with one eye on the news on television, or worse even, a soccer game going on. Or reading sports results on the teletext system. The only times he was mildly interested in making photos of me, was when he wanted sex.

It bored and saddened me. I didn’t want him to make photos of me to please me. I wanted it to be something that we did together, something that would enrich our lives in some or other way. Looking back on it now, I know it was just not his thing, and when it’s not your thing, it will never become your thing. Back then I was still searching for who I am. I was starting to break out of the bonds my upbringing had imposed on me but I had no idea that I was doing it, or where I was going. The relationship of back then was not a happy one and it took me just more than three years to finally end it. By the time I did, I still didn’t know what I wanted to do or where I wanted to go, but thanks to the gentle guidance of Master T, I began to discover who I really am, who I wanted to be, where I wanted to go.

We are two sides of the same medal, but I would never have seen it as such without the failed relationships I had. I needed to go through it all to really appreciate what I have today.

So, looking back at this photo now I don’t think about the fact that I made it behind my partner’s back, but I recall the horny moments when I made photos. The excitement, the thrill. The excitement of making photos, the thrill of not being caught, but also the excitement and thrill of sharing these photos with others online, and reading their comments. My private photo sessions always left me feeling naughty and horny, both while taking the photos and when sharing them.

And sharing all my photos with Master T later, seeing that he honestly enjoyed it and never once was jealous that I had shared it with others… now that just made me feel horny all over again!

 

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(click to enlarge)

© Rebel’s Notes

Posted in collaboration with Molly’s #febphotofest and Modesty’s Polaroids Past:

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4 thoughts on “Naughty ‘n Horny

  1. Ahhh Rebel, I know exactly what you mean by the thrill of taking photos, of risking being caught, of sharing them on-line, of being naughty naughty naughty etc. And, of course, the humour in it all. But sometimes fiddling around with tripods, time-delays, remotes etc. can be very frustrating and detract from the erotisism of the act. Indeed, sometimes that fiddling becomes very deflating! 🙂

    I often crave for someone else behind the lens

    • Marie Rebelle says:

      I know what you mean and I am happy that I have Master T to take the photos and that He enjoys it too 🙂

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