Restless

Some time ago the prompt for Wicked Wednesday was “assume“. There was this one thing that got stuck in my head after reading all the entries. (I just cannot remember where I have read it, so if anyone recognizes this, please let me know so I can link the post.)

What got stuck in my head is this: do not assume that because I am in a D/s relationship, I am doing ‘sub things’ all the time.
Yes, I always have a sub mindset. I am always ready for His orders, for His demands, always ready to do whatever Master T expects of me and whenever He expects it of me.

However, life happens. And when life happens, some things move to the background…

Like when we were very busy with renovations in the house. Or when Master T had an infection in His leg, which left Him limping and in pain. Or when I had a bad spell of low blood pressure, leaving me not feeling well. All these things made our D/s activities move to the background. Our commitment was still there. We still felt the same about being in a D/s relationship. That had not changed and it probably never will. I knew and understand all these things, knew that life has to be lived and priorities had to be set, but still I got restless. I always get restless when it has been too long since a play date or a play scene. And it has been too long…

Am I the only one that get restless like this? Am I the only one that miss the control of my Dom/Master when life happens around me? What do you do in a case like this? Do you talk to your Dom/Master and tell Him how you feel? Do you ask Him for tasks or a play scene? Do you ask Him to flog or spank you? How do you handle these situations?

I need to feel His control…

The last time this happened with us, after my being under the weather and the renovations in the house being halfway and Master T still in pain but apparently on the mend, I talked to Him. I told Him how much I missed His control, How I needed it. Of course He knew all of it without me saying it, but for my own sanity I had to say it. I had to discuss it. I had to make known that I was going crazy without His control. That I felt like a ship adrift on the ocean. I needed to be guided back to the harbour, back to the safety of His control. Only He could help me with it, no one else could.

By saying it, discussing it with Him, I already felt better. I knew He understood. Some of my restlessness disappeared. And more of it disappeared when He gave me a task to keep my mind occupied… with the promise of more to follow.

© Rebel’s Notes

The prompt for this week’s Wicked Wednesday was #mindset
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