30 Days of Submission: Day 6

Continued from… Day 5

What do you feel are the roots of your submission? Do you think it has something to do with childhood? Is it a relationship management tool as in the practice of domestic discipline? Is it a sexual thrill or something else?

If someone is gay, do we ask them where that comes from? Do we ask them whether they think it has something to do with their childhood? Do we ask them if it’s a sexual thrill? Oh yes, I know there are a group of people that are convinced that being gay is something that comes from nurture and not by nature. But there is a huge amount of people that accept that being gay is just as normal as being… well, normal!

So why can’t this be said for submission? Why can it not just be accepted as another variation of a sexual personality? Why does it have to come from ‘somewhere’ or be the outcome of something that happened in ones childhood? Or why should it be seen as a sexual thrill? We do not question people who are in a 100% vanilla relationship, do we?

I guess what I want to say it that being submissive does not necessarily have to come from anything, but might just be a feeling that some of us have inside us. It’s the way some of us are wired and we are fortunate enough to live our lives, acting on the core feelings inside of us. Just like someone is born with homosexual feelings, others are born with submissive feelings.

That all said, I also want to add that I believe that whatever kind of upbringing one had, you always bring elements of those into your adult life. The first seven years a child is formed. Whatever you learn or experience during those years, have an influence on the way you see or do things in your adult life.

Did my childhood contribute in any way to my submissive feelings? My honest answer to this is that I just don’t know. I grew up in a conservative country, in a conservative family, where the father was head of the family. However, my mother worked too and she had a say in everything. My father was a very dominate man and I despised the way he sometimes treated my mother and us kids. Late in my teenage years I rebelled against his dominance, an sub-consciously rebelled against any kind of dominance for many, many years.

To us it is not a relationship management tool at all. Our D/s relationship was something that always slumbered below the surface. Master T. allowed me to discover myself in my own tempo, not pushing, not suggesting, not implying anything. I am still learning about my submission and yes, to me it is a sexual thrill also, but primarily my submission is who I am. I need and want to be there for Master T. to use in any way that He wants. I need to know He controls me. I need to feel that I am not only His wife, but His property, His possession.

I do not feel complete without my submission to Master T.

To be continued… Day 7

© Rebel’s Notes

4 thoughts on “30 Days of Submission: Day 6

  1. Louis says:

    Interesting posts. My thoughts on whether being a submissive, and a male one are mixed and like the comments above less than conclusive. Am i influenced by formative childhood experiences, as in homelife, eg parental upbringing or was i precomposed to being submissive to females? I too have been broughtup in a conservative and may i say a rather sexually repressed country, the united kingdom. A society where even the basic idea of showing “feelings” is an alien concept. Let alone discussions/debates on subjects as these here. The tags kinky or perversion can and do have different connatations within this society, and not in a positive tone either. So the question of ‘inheritance’ or just ‘preference’ are important talking points. Be that for, as commented, homosexuality, addictions, be that alchohol, drugs, gambling or sex. Is one born an ‘addict’ or is it a ‘disease’ question?? All i can say is my mother, and to a lesser degree, father were strict with me. My mother was the ‘dominant’ in the household. My father wasnt a weak man either, but seemed happy to just “roll” with my mother’s characteristics. This obvouisly included me also, whether i liked it or not! And most times i didnt like her atitude with me. So you may conclude if anything, when regarding submission or dominance, i would fit perfectly into the male ‘dominant’ if anything? But, nope thats far from the story, i love being ‘controlled’ and ‘dominated’ by the female sex. Be that within a sexual format, or generally. I guess i just “bow down” to the superior female intelligence haha! Or there again maybe im just your regular ‘sado-masachist’ and need, desire women to abuse, own, and dominate me. Which explains why im on this kinda website right now 😉

    • Thanks, Louis, for your comment.
      I guess none of us will ever understand why we grow up the way we do. So many elements play a roll in our developments… the place where we grow up, the country, the people around us, one or two parents, loving and caring or abusive parents, whether we have siblings, whether you are the oldest or the youngest child, the friends you hang out with, the kind of school you are in… etc! So many elements form us to the people we are and there is no way to explain it. We should just embrace who we are, accept ourselves and all people should accept other people for who they are too. Won’t it make a much better world if we all just accept and respect other people, no matter what way they choose to live their lives?
      Thanks again for taking the time to comment 🙂
      Rebel

  2. I think this post really puts into words some feelings that I haven’t been able to voice. I too feel like submission doesn’t have to come from anything, it just is what it is. I am aware that most of our adult wiring is done in early childhood, and there are things that happen during that time of our lives that have a deep impact in our would view as adults, however I doubt we will ever have the technology to understand it. These things aren’t flaws, they are just personality traits. Some people grow up to be assholes, some people grow up to be neat, some grow up to be messy, and others realize they are just submissive.

    Very neat post. I look forward to reading more.

    • You are so right, Deni… being submissive is not a flaw, it is a personality trait. Thank you so much for your comment!
      Rebel xox

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